All of us, men, women, have their own, sometimes peculiar habits. We szhivaetsya them and cease to notice them. Well, not for nothing that they say that habit, they say - second nature. Natura is nature, and we are quite comfortable with their lives ... As long as these "lovely manners" does not begin to annoy someone and do not fall into the category of "stupid." Of course, this concerns mainly those most often confronted with them. That is, the spouses. Stupid habit husbands and wives are often the main cause of disagreement between them. And it may be a cause for divorce.
Why is this happening? Can not the same people meeting before marriage, ignore the not very nice to each other's habits? Can not. They somehow see them, of course. Especially when there are more than one day. Here are just at the stage of establishing relations of love and such habits seem extraordinary or insignificant. But then, in family life, suddenly start eyesore even enrage. The result - a cooling of emotions, the decline in sexual interest, alienation of spouses, infidelity, family breakdown and other troubles of marriage ... And yet - because of the fact that, for example, the husband likes to eat straight from the pan, and the wife can not resist buying another hat . Well, not ridiculous? Unfortunately no. Because too often in young families going on. Yes, and those who are older, things are not much better. This is a very common problem, no stranger to many. So what happens to us and how to deal with it?
Common features of the relations between men and women
Our world is inhabited by people of different sexes, and this fact can not escape it. Otherwise, perhaps life would be unbearably boring. At the same time, men and women differ not only in their physical gender. They have different understandings of the essence of things and perceive reality as a whole. And therefore can not be considered a thing with the same point of view. And that means that the confrontation between men and women - a thing eternal and indestructible.
Exactly this is the mortgaged by nature, resistance and leads to problems in communication between the sexes. Well, for example, take the notorious female logic, which is constantly made fun of the stronger sex. Like, in the mind of the ladies continuous chaos, so trust them in any case impossible. Today kicked one, tomorrow - another, the day after tomorrow - the third. In short, unreliable, uncontrollable and unpredictable.
I must say that they did right. The real woman in his actions and can not meet the rigid and limited male logic. She's just a different way of thinking! More intuitive, more abstract and therefore, in terms of men, a bit messy. But this in no way speaks about female insecurity. In the end, the most important thing in the world - the birth and education of children - the trust is the fairer sex. So still the question who in this world is more reliable ...
Well, we are not talking about changes. We are trying to deal with the stupid habit of husbands and wives, and the attitude towards him. So, men annoying female illogic. And women, in turn, male stubbornness and tediousness. Here pray - hard to him hard to shake the ashtray and washed their dishes - all to no avail! And about taking out the trash and not worth talking about. This has already been telling jokes. Specifically, he acts on the nerves, or what?
No, not specifically. Our male brain is so constituted that place in it for ashtrays, dishes, garbage and other stuff is not there. They are therefore of such nonsense and do not remember. And we are angry, irritated, scandals, considering that we are treated dismissively. They believe that everything is in order, and quickly written "scandalous finding fault" in the category of hysterics. Well, no, but what, in fact, screaming something? Just think, a mountain of dirty dishes and full ashtrays around the house ... The ceiling did not fall on it!
That's about how things stand with the men and women trying to find a consensus in the communion. The problem is that we do not take into account the gender characteristics of each other. And trying to get each other to think so, as thoughts themselves. And this is simply impossible. Fruitless desire to impose their own view of half of the world leads to a cooling of emotions. And these lovely heart quirks that half turn into annoying at times shall communicate to the white heat of habit. All this may result in failure. But because of what ?! Here let's look at what habits spouses often complain of both sexes.
The bad habits of women from the perspective of men
So, what we can so irritate his pious?
- Talkativeness. Yes, that we did not take. We love to talk. It is a psychological need and do not escape from it. Here are just sticking to talk to men, we do not count one. Their brains are not able to quickly perceive and analyze the sea of information that a woman can throw in a few minutes. We chattering, a man does not have time to realize what was going on. And begins to annoy;
- The desire to buy a bunch of shoes and a lot of unnecessary from a male perspective of things. It must be said that such actions can not afford all the fairer sex. Therefore, they must irritate when the money in the family is not enough. And if you have enough, so why not buy something? It's just a hobby. And it is pleasant to the same;
- I love the series. Yes, women love soap operas. Because everything is beautiful. And then - not very. That sometimes want to escape from the cooking, washing machine, dirty dishes and dust in the corners;
- A long habit to gather for a meeting or a party. And there, perhaps, become popping up on street uncombed, with smeared makeup and costume, which is old and full! A woman should be a woman. And look your best;
- Habit mutter and itch for any occasion. Then men would have to agree. Eternally dissatisfied with all the lady will bring rabies to anyone;
- The habit of asking, "Do you love me? ". Yeah ... so hard to say "Yes" or something? However, we really have too often intrusive and can ask this question a hundred times a day:
- The habit of checking emails husband, his pockets, messages and calls to mobile phones and to control his actions. It's hard to argue with the men. Total control can not be touched and happy. And women often they are addicted. And give up such actions majority of them simply can not. Well, at least when it is necessary to do so thin, discreet and not throw at Blessed with a huge scream, "What is this Tanya (Viktor, Claudia Ivanovna) to call you ?! ".
Well, what our habits often complain about men, we kind of understood. Now let's look at what habits are usually grumbling husbands wives.
The bad habits of men from a female perspective
So what, as a rule, has been criticized in the husbands of his wife?
- The reluctance to wash their dishes. Yes, a few representatives of the stronger sex burning love in the process. Well, it is not clear why wash up on a plate, if you can collect the whole mountain, and then ... and then wait until it peremoet wife;
- Spreading around the house socks, shirts, wet towels and so on. There is true. It is fair to say that not all men are so sloppy. There are also pedants who carefully monitored to ensure that every thing in the house has always been in place. And nobody knows that better - the road to pick up socks and towels or constantly hear from him the whole moralistic tirades and rebukes in his own carelessness;
- The ability to sit on the toilet for hours. Sit accurately. And they're just doing all this time? There are even instances built himself in such a cozy place stands for laptops, books and magazines. That's because ... Thinkers, in a word;
- Forgetfulness in relation to family memorials. Actually, of course, sad when your favorite forgotten about the wedding date. But we have talked above about the differences in male and female thinking. Well, here we all remember it, and they - not;
- Habit yell the house down when favorite football team scores a goal, or, on the contrary, it misses. Well, no, that such and such? The ball is in someone's gate - a common occurrence! Why so nervous? The answer to this question look at the beginning of this article. Thinking they have such a thing!
- The habit of wearing the same clothes for decades. And this despite the fact that in a wardrobe full of new things. That he loves the darn - pereshtopanny tacky sweater and jeans, and everything! Just a shame before others in such outfit Believing:
- The habit of lying on the couch for hours, constantly changing channels TV. Lies, lies ... And maybe let it lie? And more to the left will escape!
Well, that is all.
I must say that this is so annoying habit men have guys on the stage of courtship even make attractive. "Oh, what a cutie he is in this old sweater! Oh, how courageous it seems that a fan of his football team! ". And so on.
Familiar? Familiar to many. These facts can be considered weighty decision for the severance of relations? It is ridiculous. And it is not funny, because they really are often the reason for the break. How with them, with these habits, then it is? Correct? Do not notice? Tolerating?
How to treat the habits of his half
Frankly, all those habits, which we are now told, the real reason for the break in relations not. The reason for this is usually the accumulated irritation. When the day-to-day wife pick on each other's actions, good not wait. If they value their feelings, should think over their behavior. Finally, I understand that everyone is different. A habit only emphasize individuality. It certainly is not a bad habit.
In general, the tendency to criticize others and try something to fix them - too bad habit. Nobody wants to listen to the edification and constant criticism. The family is not based on the idea of improving the other person. Conversely. The marriage implies that husband and wife take the other as they are. And we throw something remodel. Well, he throws the clothes, well, she spent hours talking on the phone, so what? It will be better when he is drinking, and she changed lovers like gloves? It is because some small household inconsistencies should fall apart the family?
The manner of conduct of men and women are different. It dictates the floor. If a representative of a strong sex begins to deal with women's affairs, over time it becomes feminine traits. If she tries to think and act rationally and logically, sooner or later it will behave like a man. Who needs it? It's a disaster!
Yes, let husbands vylёzhivayut sofas and throw wet towels on the floor! Only then are breadwinners and protectors. And let the woman hanging on the phone for hours, illogical act and behave impulsively. But there are homemakers and mothers. Or, in the end, even if sometimes switch roles. Also helpful.
In general, try to change the other person - a thankless task. The more we are in something blame their loved ones, the more they resist. Such resistance could eventually turn into anything: a protest in the form of infidelity, alcoholism, divorce. And it all began with grumbling about the dirty dishes and about her husband's habit of sitting on the toilet for long periods.
The family - the same team. It employs the same principles for resolving disputes, and drawing up contracts. If we are simply enraged husband habit with him, you can just calmly discuss the issue. And to come to some common agreement and its decision. Just do not be in such a situation to attack his mate, accusing pile of disadvantages. It is better to try with a friendly irony draw her attention to certain habits and gently explain why they are causing discomfort to others.
In principle, you can find lots of ways to solve problems. She throws her husband at home clothes? Zavedёm little dog. They love to carry off in a nook that was lying anywhere. My wife makes too long to wait, going to the party? Well, so do not wait a couple of times. Let get to the destination itself! Dodgy need to be. And diplomatically. And do not shove like a tank on the front, which has two options - either from the fighter on the forehead to get a grenade, or this unit in the ground to bury.
If a person has a habit, then it exists as a person. Otherwise it's just a robot. And to live with a mechanical creation is not so easy. Yes, and not very interesting. His every action is correct, every intention predictable. This fresh life can quite quickly get up the throat.
Of course, there are situations where the habits of the second half are straw that broke the patience. Usually this happens when men and women have outlived their usefulness. But in this case to talk about someone's habits do not have to. There they are either absent special significance here is not. Feelings is no more. So, habits and problems either.
Small and not very antagonisms between the sexes - is absolutely normal. They are balancing the different poles of the world and contribute to the natural harmony. So, man and woman are two opposite poles, the method of interaction which is unchanged. Such is the hopeless prospect. And so that's a wonderful prospect! Because as long as the business will fare this way, humanity will remain a chance on love. If you turn everything upside down, chances are likely to disappear. And we are so in need of love! So let's look at the simpler albeit uncomfortable, but, by and large, just funny habits of their halves.