The alcoholic in the family ... The situation is, unfortunately, often terrible. Everyday life with an alcoholic in a house turns into hell. Hell exists and when the drinking person is aggressive, and when drunk he is quiet as a mouse, and even when he is sober. Because households are in a state of extreme stress always. When an alcoholic is stubborn - they are forced to defend themselves when he, being drunk, calm, they are experiencing the bitterness, worrying about a loved one, and when he was still sober - all the time waiting for a new horror binge, because the alcoholic behavior is unpredictable. Living next to alcohol dependence is very difficult. And doubly hard when you love this man, I sincerely wish to free him from a terrible addiction, but had no idea how to do it. What to do? Let's try to discuss this, ill for many, the question. Perhaps we can find some way out.
Why do people become alcoholics?
How to know in advance the alcoholic in the future and can you tell me? Indeed, in his youth, when we possessed romanticism, just beginning to meet the person, fall in love with him and with all my heart wish to connect a life with it, we will, of course, do not assume that later on it will be poured. And if after years spent together, we still continue to love our partner in life, addicted to the bottle, we feel a sense of guilt. We think that something overlooked, somewhere were cruel, in something man paid little attention. So he started to become an inveterate drunkard. Is it so? And so, not the case.
Why do people become alcoholics? It is difficult to find a definite answer. The reason for this may be a genetic predisposition, the desire to escape from the turmoil of life, strained family relationships, influence others ... It is believed that drink too much, for the most part, people with a weak will. However, it happens and so that strong-willed, capable of decisive actions, the man suddenly starts to kiss the bottle, slowly but surely turning into a chronic alcoholic.
Alcoholics are not suddenly and not all drinkers, so the exact answer to the question: "Why do people become alcoholics? " no. Sometimes a person predisposed to alcoholism, can be recognized by some moments of his behavior. Suppose a nice young man, charming, sociable, soul of the company, often appears on the date slightly under Shafei. At first, even like a girl - he is cheerful, sociable, talkative. Cheerleaders have here a young lady - there are signs of an alcoholic - but it serene - because a girl like so much this young man, where here to sanity and pragmatism! Well, what he drinks ... That's right, the costs of violent youth. "It will take! "- Solves the girl and sent a man to the registrar.
Years go by, and a man addicted to drinking, not only does not pass - it grows almost every day. And now, instead of a beautiful healthy boy in front of exhausted and prematurely aged woman - a slovenly man with hunched dull eyes, trembling hands, and with obvious signs of chronic alcoholics have. He has one goal in life - to fill the empty glass. Everything else - children, wife, job - receded into the background. Looking at him, loved ones and feel disgust and shame, pain and alienation. And yet, the tenderness, love and hope. What should the wife of an alcoholic? Someone can not withstand such a test, and gets rid of the burden. But many of those who, against the advice of others to leave the hopeless attempt to fix it remains close to the man drinking and looking for ways to help him.
What can you advise reshivsheysya to sacrifice his wife an alcoholic? Unfortunately, the universal methods to help recover hard-drinking person to normal life, does not exist yet. However, there are options for the behavior of its relatives, which it is desirable to adhere to, if we're going to be near the man to the end.
How to deal with an alcoholic?
Living with an alcoholic is complex as a whole, and if it is, moreover, and a loved one, it becomes doubly difficult. Drink too much in front of their husbands, children, parents - is very painful and frightening. After all, we remember them with others - cheerful, cheerful, purposeful! And now before us - degraded inferior person, and then, as often and very often exhibiting unwarranted aggression. How to deal with an alcoholic, not to harm him and maximize the positive result?
Close drinker, trying to help him, often allow the same mistakes
. Of course, they regret their alcoholics, explaining all that a person is weak will and defending such an explanation, first of all, themselves from the negative issues
. Someone begins to hide the bottles and the money someone makes drinking person to recognize his own alcoholism and swear that the more it will not happen again, someone forced him to agree to treatment
. Unfortunately, all these methods are effective means of alcoholics can not be
. As long as he does not appear near the ineradicable and fierce desire to get rid of the destructive addiction, no hidden bottles and money, no desire to pull out of his oath influence not have much influence
. The bottle he finds out, forget the oath, and compulsory treatment of alcoholics rarely gives stable positive results
. Drinker man himself is well aware that collapses, and feels a sense of guilt that is often expressed in the form of aggression
. Pressure is only exacerbated by the state of dependence, and it is not helping alcoholics, and the harm that those who only got this way under the pressure of relatives can quickly slide down to the bottom
We have already said that alcoholics are for many reasons. Perhaps to determine the cause, you can figure out how to cure an alcoholic and eliminate the problem itself? Alas, to determine the cause of a man drinking a little deeper. He's really sick, and immediately refocus the mind and let him have a former alcoholic a healthy lifestyle impossible. It takes time, during which someone will have to spend a lot of mental strength to his rehabilitation. In the treatment of alcoholics rehabilitation period is very important. They need to give something in return drunken happiness, and that "something" must be found. Such replacement may be traveling, meeting interesting (in any case not drinking) people, nature trips, visits to cinemas, theaters, - anything, as long as it is carried away by the former alcoholic as much as possible.
In general, when a person is drinking, do not reproach him for it, and talk about their feelings: pain, powerlessness, indignation. This will force him to defend himself, and in the behavior of an alcoholic will increasingly be aggressive. Needless to say that the life of an alcoholic in this case would be unbearable? The best answer to the question: "How do you get an alcoholic to be treated? "- Possibly a calm demonstration of dedication on the part of his family and the open expression of a position like this:" I'm saving you. " This will give an opportunity to find solutions to the problem of how to stop the alcoholic who is likely, and he will begin to actively look for ways to escape.
Some husbands, wives, mothers, children, exhausted by life with an alcoholic and did not give up hope to relieve dear person from dependence, free him from any responsibility. This is the wrong move - exhausted alcohol a person can not adequately perceive the reality, and it is likely trying to apprehend native ease his plight as an attempt to get rid of him. Drinker person must feel that he is in demand in the world that without it will cost, and it need. Such an understanding is a very powerful tool in the fight against alcoholism, and one of the leading answers to the question how to deal with an alcoholic.
By understanding that is vital to stop drinking alcoholic to come himself. Of course, his family, to reflect on how to treat the alcoholic must be prepared to this point and learn about rehabilitation centers and clubs, Alcoholics Anonymous, operating nearby. It is not necessary at this record going to completely get rid of dependence relative to the reception to a specialist without his knowledge. Excessive insistence on this matter may do much harm. A specialist alcoholic need to go without any pressure from outside.
Relatives drinker remember: long-term abstinence from alcohol still, alas, is not an indicator of complete deliverance from addiction. Relapses are still very likely. How to stop an alcoholic, not giving it back down to the bottom of life? You have to be prepared for the fact that he will long stay in a bad mood, will make trouble, to find fault with others, and in any case do not argue with him, adding fuel to the fire. Yes, this period of life with an alcoholic is very heavy. But if we are to restore a person completely have to be patient and take it to a non-drinker.
It should be noted that often in families considered alcoholics regularly and quite a lot of people drinking and begin to apply enhanced measures for their rehabilitation, up to the treatment. This is the wrong way - not all drinkers are alcoholics, but under pressure from all can become so. How to determine the alcoholic not to make such a mistake?
How to determine the alcoholic?
Alcoholism is not determined by how often and how much a person drinks. Alcoholics are those who have established a strong dependence on alcohol. How to determine the alcoholic and distinguish it from the normal drinker? If a person has seen at least three symptoms of alcoholism, it is time to close to sound the alarm - the disease begins. This symptoms such as:
- One often assumes alcohol, despite the fact that it must perform some duties;
- The man is drinking more and for longer than planned;
- The person needs to regularly increase the dose in order to achieve a state of intoxication, or, on the contrary, it starts to get drunk on much smaller than the former, doses.
Common symptoms of chronic alcoholism is expressed as follows:
- Man tries to reduce alcohol consumption to a minimum, but he can not;
- A person may be given a lot of time the extraction of alcohol, a lot of drinking and drunken, very long time to return to a normal state, experiencing a heavy hangover;
- The man is drinking, despite the fact that his drinking led to problems in the family and at work;
- Man can not come out of a hangover without taking alcohol.
If we have an idea how to find an alcoholic, and noticed the presence of these symptoms in a loved one, you need to guard. Skip the moment when it is still possible to stop it pretty easy, easy. Life, work and daily bustle of time-consuming, and tired, we sometimes too lightly to the fact that our loved ones (and often ourselves) is passed every day a glass or two of "appetite for." No, sometimes they are just for the appetite or to relieve stress, but in fact the distinction between the norm and the excesses of a very thin and moves it quickly. Ambient, even knowing how to determine the alcoholic may initially take it calmly and think suddenly only then, when it will go too far. Therefore, it would be better if someone who is prone to alcoholism, he oversaw the adoption of alcohol and does not go beyond the limits.
How to recognize a drunkard and not let him get the upper hand? Domestic alcoholic manifests itself in an uncontrollable desire to add more. If it is not tsyknut, additives may continue for as long as reality does not lose shape and does not rasplyvёtsya. We settled in an alcoholic makes itself felt morning blackouts, severe headache, apathy and a desire to drink the morning after the feast.
How to deal with this inner alcoholic? Firstly, it is not necessary to persuade myself not to drink if you drink like: the forbidden fruit is sweet, and the more we try to forget about it, the more it attracts us. The desire to enjoy a normal and adequately evaluate our human condition is always something due. It may be stress, prolonged stress, severe physical and psychological fatigue, and even very great joy. If it occurred, it is best to try to escape to something fascinating: a good movie, read a great book, take a walk through the beautiful streets and marvel at nature and so on. When absolutely unbearable, you can enjoy a bit of quality alcohol, but it should be done in good company with nice and self-sufficient people. The last tip does not apply to those who were alcoholics: they drink any alcohol is not recommended.
In general, life is so amazing, that really does not need embellishment it using alcohol. The world is full of wonders, and do not look for them on the bottom of the bottle - they are always at hand. So let us not take away the possibility of sincere joy of life nor yourself, nor have their loved ones.